it’s sad that i’ll probably get hate for saying this, but… calling trans women “men in dresses” in an attempt to insult them is… bad. there’s nothing wrong with being a man who wears dresses. male gender non conformity is good.
honestly, considering such expression is something conservatives often use to insult feminine gay men, you probably shouldn’t be using the same rhetoric. just saying.
it really PISSES me off that i have to look to find out things like this. THIS IS A BIG DEAL THIS should be all over the news, especially since everyone in the mentions says they want to help but none of us know how)
This remains an underreported issue, particularly in Western-based media outlets. Many of these stories are from 2017 and comparatively few stories could be found on this issue (they are published a few months apart instead of daily or weekly like stories about Mueller and Kate Middleton and whatever the president tweeted last). I am listing sources from various global sources below.
early on in my life and it was a label i rly embraced. i think my first boyfriend i had was at least partly, if not completely, responsible for crushing that proud & abrasive girl in me, bc he would impose ideas on me like how i was “indecisive” (because i was considerate/indifferent on making decisions) and at one point told me i wasnt being a good enough Girlfriend because i wasnt Like The Other GirlfriendsTM and just shit like that (over at least the course of our 3 and a half yr high 2/?
school relationship. around the time i was about to go into college, i had first started hearing about transppl. i think my initial train of thought had been almost automatically kind of “”“"terfy”“”“ that a transmasc buddy of mine was just “hurting female liberation are u just enforcing gender roles by being a binary transman” etc. the in college i started using tumblr and got introduced to the lgbt community, eventually found instances of “gender euphoria” in my life, experimented calling 3/?
myself nonbinary, noticed i was experiencing ACUTE dysphoria, eventually came to conclude i was Fully ftm and now its two yrs since ive socially transitioned, ~1.5 years since ive started medically transitioning. im lucky bc i can still be relatively healthy and i pass completely. … until i inevitably out myself as a transguy, because its literally impossible for me to have an honest conversation with someone while omitting the first 20 years of my life. i think mostly what i wanted to 4/?
talk about this for was my thought process deciding i Was trans and Needed to transition. ive had periods of doubting myself, which i think every trans person has every now and again. but i think for me at some point i had to really sit down and think: am i really trans, or am i just some radical feminist (before id ever heard of radfem theory) thats frustrated with the box im being put in as a woman? for myself, i concluded the former, because i couldnt see myself satisfied with staying as 5/?
a woman. (also now i would argue that i have body dysphoria that medically transitioning has helped with SIGNIFICANTLY.) but i just find it kind of funny in a way how ive come full circle to starting out with some radfem-esque thoughts, finding out im trans and basically fitting the tucute tra archetype (minus the activism), to now becoming almost unacceptably rad-leaning in thought in most of my friend groups lmfao. in a lot of ways, transitioning and then after revisiting radfem theory 6/?
i think is what’s brought me most at peace with my womanhood, and maybe even proud of it. i catch myself thinking things like “boy im sure glad im a woman”. i dont think i should ever detransition, since ive finally gotten comfortable with myself/my body, which seems contradictory and weird but thats just how it is for me???? anyway, ive seen people talk about dysphoric lesbians, he/him lesbians, but i have yet to see any mention of dysphoric bi/het females. i understand lesbians have 7/?
a rly complicated relationship with ?gender? and gender roles and living in a male-dominant society and rebelling against that in almost every single way by just existing and loving women, so im not trying to be like #DysphoricHetPride or something like that. but i just ?? i just havent seen it talked about and thought i should share. hope thats okay i know this was a Lot asdgjkg 8/8
This story is so beautiful and offers so much unique perspective. Anon, I’m so happy you’ve reached a point in your journey where you feel like you have a grasp on yourself and how you can live happily and without harm. Even if your identity feels complicated, or maybe hard to explain, that does not make it any less real. Our identities are often complicated, and so many lack the introspection it takes to really truly see themselves honestly. It feels like you have an honest take on yourself, from who you are innately to how social influences have played a role on your life. Feel confident knowing that while we do not get to decide what complications get added to our life, we get to choose how to respond to them. It sounds like you’ve responded in the way that makes you happiest and healthiest, and I’m so proud of you for doing that.
If you’re looking for other FTM radfems to maybe see how they navigate the two experiences, you should consider following:
And I’ll reblog with more when I can peek at who I follow! Additionally, if any FTM radfems are willing to give their input, I’m sure anon would appreciate it! 🙂
im bisexual, dysphoric and consider myself to be ftm. i understand you, anon. reading radfem theory and becoming radleaning has made my dysphoria rather an interesting experience, not as in it made it better, but it changed it.
instead of being utterly disgusted by my female sex characteristics, i’ve become sort of… apathetic towards them? i very strongly want male sex characteristics, but i can somewhat function in my natural state. sure, there are days when it gets worse, and other days where it’s manageable. radfem theory has eased down the social aspects of my dysphoria, to sum it up.
i also relate to the “im glad im a woman” thing. im not happy with being female bodied, but im glad i wasn’t male socialized. im glad i have a sisterhood with women and same sex attracted females. it’s something i talk about, my experiences with being raised as a girl and growing up same sex attracted, and how me being ftm now or transitioning in the future won’t change that, it shaped my personality. i will never shut up about it, no matter how much liberal homophobes and misogynists hate it.
take pride in who you are, regardless of what route you choose to relieve your dysphoria. those are difficult choices, and none of them make you lesser, regardless of what people say.
Witches have always been women who understand the difference between female and male. Witches were the first midwives, using their herbal knowledge to assist with menstruation, pregnancy, and birth. Witches have always prioritized women and the female body.
“Let Patriarchy Burn,” anonymous member of Earth First! off our backs, May-June 2003.
female only spaces are so important to women and girls trying to protect themselves and so few people are critically analyzing why they’re being taken away
the one problem i have with people my age and younger is that a lot of us do not have hands on hobbies. like i have spoken to so many people my age who go to work, go to school and then fuck around on their phone/computer for hours and then ???????? like no wonder ur depressed and have low confidence in urself. u need to get ur hands on something, feed those dopamine receptors! learn how to play guitar, garden, scrapbook, fucking make model trains. i don’t give a shit, MAKE SOMETHING!!
it feels better than drugs when i finish making a thing—and then show it off or gift it.
and then so people my age say to me ‘well—i can’t draw/paint/knit/etc. like you can. my stuff would be terrible.’ yeah, well duh—a part of developing skill is sucking at something and then practicing it over and over and over again until you suck less. u’ll have a hard time feeling lonely or bored when you can’t stop thinking abt a technique you want to try or something you want to make for someone else. making things has SAVED MY LIFE. it gave me a reason to keep living day after day when i wanted to die.
making things improved my generational relationships (when i worked for the newspaper i would talk to customers abt jamming recipes or cross-stitch, one of my grandmas always gives me pattern books and tell me abt when she knitted things for mom, my other grandma is giving me a wedding quilt that HER grandma gave her 50 years ago because she knows i will appreciate it). it also got me likeminded friends who also make things.
take a ceramics class! pick up water colors, bake cakes! learn to work on cars! make soap. DO SOMETHING THAT DOESN’T INVOLVE STARING AT A SCREEN.
the one problem i have with people my age and younger is that a lot of us do not have hands on hobbies. like i have spoken to so many people my age who go to work, go to school and then fuck around on their phone/computer for hours and then ???????? like no wonder ur depressed and have low confidence in urself. u need to get ur hands on something, feed those dopamine receptors! learn how to play guitar, garden, scrapbook, fucking make model trains. i don’t give a shit, MAKE SOMETHING!!
it feels better than drugs when i finish making a thing—and then show it off or gift it.
and then so people my age say to me ‘well—i can’t draw/paint/knit/etc. like you can. my stuff would be terrible.’ yeah, well duh—a part of developing skill is sucking at something and then practicing it over and over and over again until you suck less. u’ll have a hard time feeling lonely or bored when you can’t stop thinking abt a technique you want to try or something you want to make for someone else. making things has SAVED MY LIFE. it gave me a reason to keep living day after day when i wanted to die.
making things have improved my generational relationships (when i worked for the newspaper i would talk to customers abt jamming recipes or cross-stitch, one of my grandmas always gives me pattern books and tell me abt when she knitted things for mom, my other grandma is giving me a wedding quilt that HER grandma gave her 50 years ago because she knows i will appreciate it). it also got me likeminded friends who also make things.
take a ceramics class! pick up water colors, bake cakes! learn to work on cars! make soap. DO SOMETHING THAT DOESN’T INVOLVE STARING AT A SCREEN.
all I can say to my radfem sisters is like…make sure you’re also following some puppy blogs, some fall blogs, some architecture/painting/cooking/whatever special interest that brings you peace and relaxation, some discourse-free lesbian couples blogs, some saphic wedding blogs… literally anything additionally to break up some of this constant stream of emotionally draining content. Its necessary and important.